Journal January Entry 7: Movement

Journal January — Day 7

Prompt: What makes you feel instantly more like yourself?

Movement does.

Not the kind that demands perfection or discipline for its own sake, but the kind that meets me where I am. The kind that works with my body instead of against it.

For a long time, movement was something I performed. I came up in the ballet world, where the body is both instrument and object, where control is praised and pain is often reframed as progress. I loved it deeply, but I also learned to disconnect from my body in order to meet its demands.

For a while after I left the professional industry, I didn’t quite know how to move without rules. Without mirrors. Without correction.

Reclaiming movement has been a quiet, ongoing return to myself.

These days, I feel most like myself when I’m in motion that feels supportive rather than punishing. Pilates, where strength is built slowly and intentionally. Spin, where rhythm and breath take over and I can disappear into the effort. Swimming, where the water carries part of the work and my body feels long and unburdened.

There’s a freedom in choosing movement for how it feels, not how it looks.

What I love most is the listening. Learning to trust my body again. Letting it lead instead of forcing it to comply. Honoring days when I need intensity and days when I need gentleness. There’s no performance here, just participation. Movement now feels like a conversation instead of a command.

When I move this way, I’m immediately more present. My thoughts settle. My nervous system softens. I remember that my body is not something to fix or overcome, it’s something to live inside of, it’s something to cherish

That’s when I feel most like myself: in motion that feels honest, chosen, and kind.